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I bet they’re good!

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In the future commercials will be a bit more realistic. Instead of teens in elbow pads burning donuts on motorcycles it will go something more like this:

[enter men with tattoos]

Damn those McNuggest look good ! Gimme your McNuggest or imma stab you! Gimme your phone!

[stab motion]

[tattooed men look at camera enjoying the McNuggets they are eating]

House

Catz

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09:44 pm: housecatz

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Little Bean

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While it’s not illegal to accidentally possess Monsanto’s seed, if it ends up in your field and reaches a certain point of growth, the patent confers ownership.

Prediction:  It won’t be altogether different from trying to get an abortion in Arkansas

House:

Catz:

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09:52 pm: housecatz1 note

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The Cost of Doing Business

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What can cars tell us about the cost of doing business?

Volvo, a Chinese auto-manufacturer, has introduced a technology called City-Safe, designed to reduce pedestrian fatalities by 72%. If every car in Australia were outfitted with this technology 53 Australian pedestrians would die each year- a great achievement- and they could cut back on the costs of painting crosswalks.

House:

Catz: It’s cold outside….

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01:22 pm: housecatz

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Neurofeedback

In the future magicians will dazzle you with technology. Don’t believe me? Maybe it’s because you’re crazy. Have you seen this graph? Look what it says about you. image

House:

Catz:

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10:46 pm: housecatz

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Obama Wades Into the Future

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Having violent thoughts? Don’t tell your therapist. He might call up some pigs. 

Thinking about acting on your violent thoughts? You may be tried outside American soil by a group of military personnel whose desk jobs involve providing customer service for Arab terrorists. Or they may just want to hang out with you, forever. You just might be asking yourself, “Where am I?”

I mean we have to prevent the epidemic on our hands of rogue violent mentally ill citizens right? It’s not like there’s been more deaths in Oakland than days in the new year, or 700 civilian drone deaths since 2004

Prediction:  Cut off the limbs to save the body. The future is here and it’s the status quo metastasized and easy pickin’ the rest of the way.

House:

Catz:  don’t let ‘em get you kid

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03:59 pm: housecatz

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Don’t Even

Don’t do it Ryan…

Prediction:  Making temptation illegal

@ 1:55 “The city made leaving your bike unlocked and unattended in public a municipal

code infraction and you can be cited for it”

10:49 pm: housecatz

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It’s Been a While…

One thing we didn’t predict ovr here at Housecatz is that eventually every new web browser and website will be incompatible with our Mac OSX 10.4.something. Well there’s old versions of Firefox - kinda like time traveling - but Tumblr apparently isn’t so lenient. So it took us 6 months to get out of the house and find a goddam Dell PC to use, and here we are. And yes, we are accepting donations, if you know any fatcatz.   

Another thing that’s been a while (too long)… parted hair:

Prediction:  In the future, wearing your hair so that a stripe of skin tears through a calm sea of hair like a lightning bolt will be considered EXTREME. Not so sure? Well, this guy thought it a sensible style to pair with his mustache.

House:

Catz:

04:03 pm: housecatz

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